


Brings Memories of You

by humaninventorysystem



Category: Star Trek: The Original Series
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Family Feels, Graphic Description, Implied Sexual Content, Infertility, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-20
Updated: 2020-06-06
Packaged: 2021-03-01 20:21:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,851
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23753002
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/humaninventorysystem/pseuds/humaninventorysystem
Summary: This fic is one I’ve been slowly working on. It is actually based off my OC Dr. Allyne McCoy who is Bones’ little sister. Of course, again, Bones will forever be a Cajun to me so references to that will be throughout the fic. This fic is focused on the familial relationship of the Reader and Bones and working through PTSD and infertility. There is also moments of Reader x Spock.
Relationships: Leonard "Bones" McCoy & Reader, Spock/Reader
Comments: 5
Kudos: 13





	1. Chapter 1

You didn’t expect your name to be called so quickly after entering the station’s cafeteria. In all truth, you weren’t the most essential member of your ship. In fact, you were here due to reassignment. You were here to meet up with another vessel to take you back onto a planet to help the Federation. Your biomedical engineering degree was fairly useful for research into topics and implementing them with newer planets, but not so necessary on a Federation vessel. That’s why when you heard a smooth deep voice calmly call your name you turned surprised.

“Yes,” you answered to the man. He was quite tall. His dark hair cut into blunt bangs that accentuated his pointed ears. Your face flushed. All the mindless noise droned on around you for a moment as you studied him. The pain of you biting your lip pulled you back into reality. 

He wasn’t part of your previous crew. He looked down at you questioningly. He seemed just as confused by the notion of you answering to his call as you were to him calling to you. He cleared his throat and explained, “I am deeply sorry. I was looking for Dr. Leonard McCoy.” The man bowed his head and stated, “I do believe you are the doctor that we are escorting. It is very nice to meet you. I am First Officer Spock of the USS Enterprise.” 

Losing interest in this man, You turned to see where he was looking the first time, “You said, Dr. Leonard McCoy?” Your heart raced as you scanned the crowded eatery with your eyes. Your eyes quickly darted to try and find the man. Butterflies filled your chest. 

Spock stood up straight and said, “Yes. Am I correct to assume you two are related?” 

“YOU,” His rough voice cried out desperately. Your head turned as you pointed at where you heard the voice only to see Leonard pointing at you. He pushed his way back to where the two of you stood. “What in Sam’s Hill are you doing here?” His blue eyes squinted into a glare. 

You coyly smiled, “Oh, is it that there can only be one Southern Federation Med Staff McCoy in space? Must be a new law.” 

“Not that,” He motioned as if throwing something off a table, “What are you doing here?” 

“Specifically,” You asked, amused by your brother’s reaction. You enjoyed playing dumb to your older brother. It always frustrated him to no end. 

Leonard growled, “Yes. Specifically. I thought you were assigned to that new research vessel.” 

Spock stood a bit between you and your irritated brother, “If I may interject, I believe Dr. McCoy was reassigned to one of the planets we were sent to make a check on. We are to transport her there along with us.” 

Leonard grumbled and rolled his eyes. “Whatever, just…” He looked you over, “Don’t do that weird thing you do.” 

You smiled and asked, “Oh this?” You looked back at Spock and studied him for a bit before commenting, “You know, you are an impeccable specimen. Your fertility rate with an ideal partner would be upwards in the 80% likelihood of successful offspring.” You laughed hearing Leo yell in frustration behind you. Your eyes squeezed closed from your laughter that you missed Spock’s questioning look. 

Then you heard another smooth voice call, “Oh I see the two of you found our new esteemed passenger.” A blonde man walked over and held out his hand, “Captian James T. Kirk.” 

You cleared your throat and introduced yourself. You took his hand and whispered towards your brother, “60 to 75 percent.” You felt him lower your hand from his lips. 

As Leonard rolled his eyes, Kirk looked up and smiled. He chuckled and asked, “Did I miss a joke?” 

“Just ignore her,” Leonard sighed, “She has this obsession with knowing inappropriate things about people.” He glared at you as you smile. 

You laughed as the captain looked interested. He winked your way and asked, “Oh is that it?” 

You nodded, “Well, something along those lines.” Your heart dropped as you followed the First Officer and Captain on the ship. The comfort of your older brother’s hand didn’t grace yours. You could understand but at the same time, you didn’t want to act off for risk of him knowing. 

You sat in the medbay with Nurse Christine Chapel and Mr. Spock. Due to personal requests, Leo was not going to be the one doing your routine mandatory check-up upon entering and joining a new ship. 

The garbled noises coming from them didn’t sound anything to you like talking. Your mind wandered far away as you were inspected. Cold radiating pressure pressing into your scar. You jolted. 

“Oh, do you still feel pain,” Mr. Spock’s voice echoed to your ears. You made a face and shook your head. You moved your hand instinctually to protect the area. 

Nurse Chapel gently intertwined your fingers with hers to move it aside, “I’m sorry dear. We still have to check you over.” 

You nodded. Throbbing pain knocked your head around like a plaything for the rest of the checkup. Once it was done and you were dressing, Leonard stormed into the room. 

“I SHOULD at least be able to advise and witness my sister’s check-up. Federation laws DO NOT prohibit that,” He yelled. Luckily, your back was towards the door so your scarring could go unnoticed unless looking for clues. 

The warm fabric of the new knit sweater dress slid past your head and down your body. You heard shuffling behind you. You could only assume that Mr. Spock had moved to block your brother from entering. “If you were to check her file,” Mr. Spock explained coolly, “You would see that you are barred from any medical information unless life-threatening.” 

You heard your brother growl. His voice boomed at the other man, “And out of all the staff does the hobgoblin have to look over her?” You smiled as Christine watched as you twirled in the mirror. You loved the new uniform fashion of short skirts and the form-fitted nature. This uniform left very little to the imagination. You liked that very much. 

Having finished getting dressed, you tried to get past the Science Officer. You placed your hand on his side. The captain’s voice called over from the back, “Would you have rathered someone else?” Spock looked down at you. He nodded in understanding and moved out of the way. You could swear that this man could be a comedian with his perfect timing. 

Your brother scanned over the new uniform and looked at Jim. You could tell he was making a face. “I guess not,” he grumbled. He motioned for everyone not stationed there to leave. 

You smiled as you got to work in the room with your brother. He seemed to avoid you most of the day though. Your heart sank. Leonard had never given you a cold shoulder. It was normally reserved for everyone besides you. You sighed as you just decided to focus on your work once more. The tests you were running always made you feel like you were Willy Wonka. Sometimes the combinations didn’t turn out with the type of medicine you wanted, but it ended up with some other cool properties. Like one gave the illusion of being drunk and another gave a side effect of floating. 

When you could not find the typical companionship with your brother, you huffed to find another person to indulge you. You wandered around the ship admiring it. It was a fairly older ship, but you could tell she was reliable. If you could choose to stay on a ship, this would be one you would choose as well. Distracted by the feel of the metal as you aimlessly walked, you felt yourself get pushed down. 

Scotty was just trying to rush back to the bridge when he accidentally rammed his weight into a smaller woman. He looked down and when he reached to apologize. Scotty noticed she had curled into a ball shaking in terror desperately grasping at her lower abdomen. “I-I’m so sorry, Miss,” the Scotsman knelt down and touched her arm gently. When he watched her face slowly look up to see him, he gave the widest smile he could muster. “Here you are, Lass. Trust me, if I had a run-in with an ogre like myself, I’d cower too,” He commented with a chuckle. 

When you slowly processed that you were still aboard the Enterprise and you were safe, you shook your head at him. “No, no,” you comforted the man, “You resemble nothing of the sort. I’m sorry.” You took his hand as he helped you rise to your feet, “You must have been trying to get somewhere, I’ll get out of your way.” 

The man nodded and asked, “Where are you stationed to work? Maybe I can give ya a better introduction.” 

You motioned towards the medbay, “Over with my grumpy brother.” 

“Oh, so you are used to being around monsters then,” He teased. 

You hid your hand behind your back to grip your other arm firmly to keep yourself grounded. You forced a smile and giggled, “Sure. One could say that.” 

“Mister Scott,” Spock’s smooth voice breezed past you to address the man, “I believe the captain requested your presence on the bridge.” 

Scotty nodded and said, “Yessir. I was right on my way when I ran over the lass here.” 

You turned and smiled at Mr. Spock. You waved towards him. He sighed and looked back to Scotty, “Go follow your orders, Mr. Scott.” He waited for Scotty to walk past him before addressing you, “I assume you are trying to adjust to being aboard a ship with your brother. If you were to have any need, do not hesitate to let the captain or I know if you need anything.” 

“If I didn’t know better,” You teased the Vulcan, “I would say that you made Mr. Scott leave because you were getting jealous.” You smirked as your body threatened to close the gap leaving only a comfortable breathing room between the two of you. 

Spock nodded and said, “Yes Doctor. I am glad you know better than to imply such. As I can understand from your language, you understand Vulcans do not have a tendency to feel such emotions.” He took hold of your shoulders as he took a step back, “Now please allow me back to my station.” 

You conceded with him and waved, “Bye Mr. Spock.” 

As you watched the man leave, you heard the disgruntled voice of your brother behind you, “Don’t get too excited. His green blood has no allowance for your ‘womanly’ charms.” 

“Oh,” You turned to him and rolled your eyes. You placed your hands on your hips, “Now you want to talk to me? I feel soo honored that you decided to grace me with your presence.” 

Leonard crossed his arms and pushed himself out of the doorway he was leaning on to spy. “You’re lucky I ain’t allowed to wash your mouth out,” he complained. 

You smiled, jogged up to him, and asked, “So what is your problem with Mr. Spock anyway?” 

“Me, problem?” He sounded insulted as the two of you laughed. 

Later, you went to your quarters to learn Leonard was right next door. You smiled. This was a perfect time to annoy your brother farther. You changed into one of your silk nightgowns and slid out into the hall only to get your shoulders caught by someone. 

A cheerful laugh filled your ears before the Captain commented, “I see you have a habit of running into my crew. So I guess I should have known it was only a matter of time before you got me caught up into it as well.” His hands slowly traced your arms before relaxing at his sides. 

You blushed and apologized, “I’m sorry. I was just trying to go visit Leo.” You pointed to his door. 

“Do you often visit your brother at night with that sort of attire? I can see why he was so upset about anyone else seeing you,” he teased with a coy smile. 

Your face scrunched in disgust, “I will pretend I didn’t hear that Captain.” 

James chuckled, “Please call me either James or Kirk.” 

“Only if you decide to be a good boy for me,” You said nervously, backing yourself more towards your brother’s room. “what are you doing here anyway,” you asked. 

Kirk smiled, “Everyone on our general shift is on this deck for convenience. I was heading to my room.” He pointed. 

You nodded and said, “Well, I’m going to go bother Leo now. I-.” You paused and then continued, “I’ll see you later Captain.” 

“Good night,” He responded with a slight bow and walking away. 

You walked into Leonard’s room and sighed. You looked around his room. You smiled at the music player and ran your hand over it. A squish of another door opening made you look towards the noise. You smiled at your brother who must have heard you walk in because he was still brushing his teeth as he walked out. He finished brushing the area he was working on, went back into the room, and came back with the brush in a different part of his mouth. 

“Wh-at r you do-ing ere,” He asked as he brushed. 

You plopped yourself down onto his bed and sat crossed legged, “Can’t I come to bother you?” 

Leonard’s eyes rolled as he walked away again. You heard him gargle and then come back. “Yes,” he stated, “It’s annoying and we are too old to be annoying each other like two teenagers.” 

“Speak for yourself,” you stuck your tongue out at him. You looked down at where your scar would be and started, “actually I...” 

Leonard patted you to move so he could get around you, “You should be going to bed. We have a lot to do tomorrow.” 

You made a face but nodded, “Yeah.” You stood and walked out, “Night Leo.” 

“Night,” he called. 

You walked into your room and laid down on your bed. Regret filled your mind. Why couldn’t you just tell your brother, you asked yourself. You turned over to your side and held your scar. You closed your eyes and awaited the morning. 

Spock sat at his desk reading the file of the new biochemical engineer on the ship. There were things about this file that was very odd. He noted the inconsistencies and called his mother for more information about the topics that caused confusion. 

Yells filled your brain. There were sounds of growling. Large thumps of bodies hitting the hard ground echoed as you tried not to scream. Tears fell down your face. You saw it once again right before going dark and hearing his voice call out to you. 

His voice melted into a different voice calling to you. One that sounded far far away and another that was very close. They asked you to awaken. You took a deep breath as your eyes opened. You shot up from your sleeping position and turned to see Leonard standing over you and Mr. Spock standing from kneeling next to your bed. Mr. Spock left without another word. Your eyes followed him as your brother tried to talk to you. 

He eventually just yelled your name to get your attention back. “Oh. Yeah,” you replied. 

“What was that,” He asked moving to sit next to you. 

You moved slightly over to give him more room, “I don’t know what you are talking about.” 

“You were crying and screaming,” Leo answered. He seemed to be getting angrier, “Loud enough were the pointy-eared fuck and I heard you.” 

Your face changed from confusion to horror, “Did I wake anyone else up?” You sat on your heels to look at him. 

Your brother shrugged. He studied you and asked, “Do you want me to stay?” His eyes betrayed that his elder sibling instinct had kicked into full swing. 

You nodded. You watched as he put his legs up on the bed to get comfortable. He opened up his arms to allow you to place your head on his chest. He let his hands run through your hair softly to comfort you much like when you were children. 

As your eyes slowly fluttered closed, you heard him whisper, “I’m sorry.”


	2. Chapter 2

After that incident of your PTSD dream, it seemed as if Leonard was indulging you more. Everything felt as if you two were back being teenagers. You even shot rubber bands at each other. Your lunches and dinners were spent laughing and singing old songs. Later after your shifts, you found the time to dance with him as well. Twirling with him to the old zydeco music made you happier than you ever had been in a while. Every time you felt as if you were being watched. You just shrugged it off at the time until you found yourself face to face with the infamous Mr. Spock. 

“Hello,” you questioned him blocking your way in the hall. 

He simply looked at you and requested, “May you follow me?” 

You nodded and followed the man. This was very peculiar. He never had asked to be alone with you and from what you remembered Vulcans typically didn’t have a private word like this unless it was a very private conversation. You furrowed your brow as you tried to figure out why Mr. Spock would have asked for you alone like this. Once the door to his quarters closed behind you, you got your answer. 

“You are to be buried on Vulcan,” He stated. This was not a question. 

You squinted at him. He was right of course but was it really necessary for him to really make a comment upon it. You replied simply, “Yes. I am to be buried on Vulcan.” Your hands went behind your back. Your right fingers gripping your left wrist 

“Why,” he asked pointedly. 

His tone allowed you the knowledge that he already knew the answer to that question but was simply asking for confirmation. You bit your lip from saying something rude, yet still allowed a response, “My late husband was a Vulcan.” 

“Is this why you must be treated at Vulcan facilities?” 

You stuttered, “H-How do you-” Your brow furrowed in confusion. There were very very few people privy to that information. 

The man restated his question once more with a bit more force, “Is this why you must be treated at Vulcan facilities?” 

You nodded, “Yes and no.” 

His brow raised. 

“I,” you paused to try and gather your thoughts. You touched your scar and looked up at the man with tear-filled eyes, “I loved him.” 

That day started as one of the happiest days of your life. Right out of the Academy and finally, back on a starship, you were working one a research and terraforming vessel. Your strong and stoic husband woke before you. He moved off the bed and got dressed. You watched as his uniform slowly covered his well-muscled frame. Your teeth scraped your bottom lip. 

“You should stop watching me and get dressed,” his deep voice called to you. 

You whined and made a point to make as much noise getting comfortable in your shared bed. You turned to stare at a picture of your handsome husband. 

You felt yourself getting scooped up into his arms, “There is no reason to be late today. You are going on an away team with me down to the surface.” He placed you down gently, “Now get dressed.” 

Truth be told, you were really excited about this away mission. That was until you got onto the surface. 

The surface was different than you expected. You turned to look at your superior officer only to see them attacked. 

Your eyes widened as you heard their screams. You fell as the sounds of tearing flesh hit your ears. 

Your husband rushed off to go help them. You panicked. Your breathing unsteady and fast. You heard a shuffle near you and turned. The next moment you felt a ripping pain near your hip. Your vision flashed from white to start to fade. You heard a phaser. Your husband’s voice shook. “No,” he stuttered, “No no no.” you heard a squishing noise and pressure. 

You slowly started to feel your husband’s panic and terror. You saw yourself torn apart on the ground and you were desperately putting yourself back together and somehow you saw your skin closing and yet you were slipping away. You felt both relieved and scared. The deep voice of your husband screaming trying to plead for you to stay alive dripped from your lips. Your heart beating fast yet slow at the same time. The heart above your lungs being slow and the heart that replaced where your liver would be beating fast. Slowly you started to lose consciousness again as this body collapsed. You were looking at yourself and your husband at the same time as you felt him slowly fade away with the rest of the world. 

You looked down at your shaking hands then back at Spock. Your eyes were full of tears. You felt your chin shivering. You bit your tongue as you swallowed. You closed your eyes and said, “I can’t feel him anymore.” Your heart raced. “I can’t…” you started to repeat. Your hands rushed back to your scar. Pressure gathered in your throat and behind your eyes. Every part of you burned. 

Realizing his mistake, Spock rushed to your side and steadied you. He walked you to his chair and eased you down into it. He took a deep breath and placed his fingers against your face. “My mind to your mind,” he stated calmly, “Your thoughts to my thoughts.” He eased himself into your mind. 

Having his presence there caused a rush of calmness to wash over you. You were safe. Everything was in the past. You were sitting in Spock’s room with him. He was safe. You were safe. You weren’t alone. He felt so much like your husband. As his presence started to fade, you felt yourself wanting more. Little did you realize what you were doing until you were fully alone in your mind feeling your lips pressed against his thin gentle ones. Coming more to terms with what was happening, you started to pull away ashamed of what you had done. 

To your surprise, you felt yourself getting pulled back and felt him press your lips against his once more. He pulled you against him. His tall slender frame felt so familiar yet different. You lost yourself kissing him. Your heart finally felt fully at ease again. When you both finally pulled away to breathe, you opened your eyes to look at him. 

Your heart fell. You knew who you were kissing, so why did it feel like this. “I’m s-sorry,” You stuttered. Your heart ached with a strange pain. 

Spock shook his head, “There is no need. I apologize. I am not who you were hoping.” 

“N-no,” You shook your head, “I overreacted. It just felt…natural.” 

He nodded and said, “I understand.” He reached down and wiped a stray tear from your cheek, “We do not have to speak of this again if you-” 

You couldn’t let him complete his sentence. You replaced his words with your lips once more before pulling back to ask, “can I stay tonight?” 

Unsurprisingly, the rest of the night was filled with tenderness and talking. Spock told you stories of his childhood in exchange for yours. You told him about your first husband per his request. Spock listened attentively. His long fingers drummed the bottom of your spine as you spoke. He was a very nice pillow. 

The next morning, you groaned. You were alone in bed. You groaned and thrashed around to get the sheets and blankets to surround you into a cocoon. You were not looking forward to apologising for what must have happened last night with a man who served on the same ship as your brother. You were so encompassed in that thought hearing his chuckle made you scream out and roll off the bed. 

Spock quickly grabbed you before you hurt yourself too much. “A-are you alright,” he stuttered. He helped you back into the bed. “I didn’t mean to surprise you. I was just getting back from my morning meditation. I did not realise I had woken you up. You were fast asleep last time I checked.” 

You shook your head and looked around. Of course, you were so trapped in your own understanding you hadn’t noticed you were still in his room. You blinked then squeaked, “I-I’m sorry.” You hurriedly started to put his sheets and blankets back on his bed properly. 

He gently rested his hands on yours. “It’s alright,” He soothed you, “We can worry about that later. It is more… We have a more imminent problem to deal with.” 

You blinked and asked, “And what would that-” 

“Good Morning, Mr. Spock” The captain interrupted your comment with his entrance. His eyes glanced at you. They studied you for a moment while a wide smile grew across his cheeks. His eyes full of his playful nature. He teased, “Mr. Spock~! I had no idea.” 

“Out,” was the only reply that the Captain was graced with from the Vulcan. 

Kirk chuckled as he made his way out the room, “We will do the meeting later then I assume.” 

“Yessir,” Spock replied, “I will meet you in the ready room in a few moments.” He turned back towards you and shook his head, “Now that the situation is out of our hands, let’s get you back to your room.” 

Being with Leonard that day was agony. Every time he called your name you felt a rush of terror that maybe he had found out. He was left with no clue though and you were not ready for the conversation to not only tell him that you had spent the night with the resident Vulcan, but that it was caused because you were married to one. You were willing to keep that to yourself for the moment. You looked at your scar. One step at a time. 

That night instead of dancing, you two decided to play a game of bridge with Scotty and your Captain. The two of you were not the best players, but you knew how to give them a run of the game. At one point, Leonard made a motion with his face and you got fed up with it. “Leo, Please just say it aloud. I can’t understand face twitches,” you snidely told him. 

Kirk followed that comment with, “Are you sure about that? You seem rather close with someone who makes only the slightest indications of emotions.” 

“Now, what is that supposed to mean,” Leonard interjected. 

Scotty placed his cards on the table and leaned back, “I think he’s referring to our Mr. Spock.” 

“I know who,” Leonard sneered. He’s nostrils flared in anger. 

“Then,” Kirk concluded, “You shouldn’t have a problem deciphering what I’m saying.” 

You sighed, “Can we just focus on the game?” 

“Not until this is all cleared up, Lass,” Scotty poured everyone a shot. 

Everyone took their shot quickly and pulled up their hands once more. Bones stared at you, “Now what is Kirk going on about?” 

“I’m playin my card,” Scotty placed his card on the table for his play at the trick. 

You shook your head and watched your brother place his card in, “It’s nothing. He’s just trying to mess with us so he can win.” 

“Like how Spock won-” Kirk started. 

Spock had walked into the room during some part of this debacle and was standing over Kirk, “Now wh-” 

“Are you sleeping with my sister Spock,” Bones nearly flipped the table with how fast he stood up seeing the Vulcan. He pointed his finger at his colleague. 

“What,” He looked at the man surprised. 

Scotty blinked, “I am-uh…” He motioned that he wanted to leave but got blocked by Kirk. 

You stood in between Spock and Leonard, “Leonard H. McCoy! You stop right now!” 

Leonard tried to push past you to get to Spock shouting obscenities. The Vulcan just walked over to the man and asked, “What is the problem with that?” 

Leonard screamed. He had to be held back by Kirk and Scotty as you turned to Spock. 

You asked him, “Was that necessary?” You felt so angry at everything going on. There was so much noise. You turned and yelled, “CAPTAIN AND SCOTTY! OUT! YOU TWO! SIT!” 

It was as if everyone honed in their Academy training and they followed to the leadership and commanding nature of your voice. 

You took in a deep breath. You sat down at the table with Spock and Leonard so that you could tell your brother about your late husband with the help of Spock there to be with you.


End file.
